Our little reader

About nine months ago, the preschool director at Northland met with me to discuss #1's behavior at school. She said he was very bright but had problems transitioning from one activity to the other and preferred to play by himself. She mentioned several possibilities ranging from ADHD to Autism to a normal phase he will grow out of. At the time, I had no idea what a journey that would take us on. We had him screened by Spring ISD, and the initial conclusion was that he was perfectly normal. He was affectionate and didn't shy away from direct eye contact. However, one of the evaluators pushed to have him evaluated further by observing him at school. After the observation and doing a thorough evaluation, the conclusion was that #1 has a mild form of autism called PDD-NOS (pervasive developmental disorder - not otherwise specified) which is basically a Miscellaneous category for all Autistic kids who do not fit a certain type of Autism, or possibly another form of autism called Aspergers. Being so young, it was difficult to distinguish which one he had because it required more evaluation of his verbal skills, and he was not talking much at the time.

Matt and I knew nothing about either or these so we tried to read about it, and to be honest the more I read the more it scared the heck out of me. I was in a weird place - I didn't want to attend group meetings because I didn't want to have to belong to a Special Needs Parents group - that is a group no one really wants to have to belong to. I went through a period of mourning, not that he was gone, but because of all of the things I thought he might never be able to do because of this condition. Would he ever be able to have friends? Go on a date? Get married? Have a steady job? Have children? I cried every day for a long time for the "someday" dreams for him that he would never experience.

My discipline methods did not seem to work at all for him, and I felt like a total failure as a parent. I tried to recall what might have caused it. Perhaps it was because he was born three months premature, but then again so was his twin brother #2 and he was not autistic. Perhaps it was the vaccinations, but once again #2 did not develop autism. The only think I could think of was that the steriod shots we had to give #1 twice daily during the period he had siezures somehow caused it. I still don't know why he has this condition, and I will always wonder.

#1 is now in a special program called PPCD at Reynolds Elementary in the morning (he rides a bus to Northland in the afternoons), and has made great strides since he has been there. I have learned a great deal about ways to help him be successful and to learn the social skills and behaviors that most kids pick up naturally. He responds best to visual cues rather than verbal ones, and he is learning more every day. He does not run away from me in parking lots or throw major tantrums quite as much and overall seems to have a calmer spirit about him. His issues at school now are staying quiet and still during nap time at school, paying attention during circle time, and outside of school his biggest challenge is getting a haircut (he still goes BALLISTIC). His PPCD teachers are confident that Cade will overcome his challenges and will be able to assimilate into a normal classroom setting for elementary school.

Although only three years old, #1 has learned to read. He reads billboards, books, canned goods, anything. He can't seem to get enough of it. Since he has learned to read, his verbal skills have increased tremendously, and he is now putting together complex sentences, rather than the "more milk please" short phrases he had been using. It dawned on me last night that the reading might have been the visual cues he needed to learn to speak.

I know God has a wonderful plan for Cade's life. It may not be the traditional path that I had once expected, but he has a purpose and is a blessing to those who know him. His handsome eyes, quick smile, affectionate cuddling, and tender heart are so sweet. God didn't give me damaged goods, he just put them in a different package than what I was expecting. I continuously pray that God would guide me through the rocky times so that when I look back I will see His pefect plan unfold.